rockinlibrarian: (librarians)
OR...not really. I mean wouldn't it be great if I got paid to keep a household fed and clothed and generally functional? Well, maybe I do, if you count Jason making more than me (he makes more in two weekends than I make in a month SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL LIBRARY AND EARMARK IT FOR EMPLOYEE WAGES *ahem*) and say maybe he's technically paying me for that? It sounds so chauvinistic when you put it that way though. But so far no one's paying me to read blogs, do yoga, indulge in inappropriate daydreams involving Martin Freeman, or sing loudly to the radio and/or the DVD the kids are watching and/or the Muzak in the grocery store (which technically isn't Muzak, but that's easier to say than "streaming light rock/adult contemporary playing over the loudspeaker"), at all. I even have to pay for the yoga twice a week.

NO, I just mean I feel like MYSELF doing the things I DO get paid for, possibly At Last. I was originally hired at our local library as a very-part-time reference librarian/circulation clerk (which, if you ask most of the board, translates strictly as "just plain circulation clerk which anyone off the street can do"-- which is totally not true! You'd be shocked how many volunteers find even circ and shelving duties beyond them!), and I've gradually wormed my way into more hours and much more time and a bit more influence in the Children's Department, but my specific duties there were never quite made CLEAR. I occasionally did programs, but pretty much on my own whim. I suggested books to be purchased, then waited for them not to actually be purchased. I put most of my librarian skillz into book displays, and those joyous moments when people actually asked me for help beyond "where's the bathroom?" and "can you put me on the computer?" Because dangit, I'm an awesome reference/reader's advisory librarian (at least in the children's/YA sections).

But lately I've gotten Duties-- CLEAR YOUTH SERVICES LIBRARIAN Duties. Two mornings a week I drive around to various area daycares with bags of books, read a couple, tell them about the rest, bring the bag from two weeks ago home. To the Library, not my house. Two evenings a week I lead programs-- the same I did last spring, an elementary-age hands-on STEAM program basically and a Family storytime-- which have been getting bigger turnouts all the time. And in between I am IN CHARGE. OF THE CHILDREN'S. AND YA. COLLECTIONS. I control the Weeding AND the Ordering! I am officially NOT scheduled for circulation but I help there anyway, especially with reference questions. Just this week I realized I need to start delegating tasks-- asking OTHER people to work on the displays, make copies, do some basic weeding, things I would have done myself before but now I no longer have TIME.

Is there anything that makes you feel more like a grownup than being able to tell other people what to do and have them take you seriously?

Actually, it's just been working GREAT. Since I've gotten clear job duties that happen to be in my areas of expertise, I've been thriving. My insecurities, immaturities, and slothful tendencies melt away when I'm working. Except the telephone. I still hate calling people on the phone. But I'm way more likely to make myself DO it at work! (Also, ANSWERING the phone at work is not a problem at all. I am ALL about professional reference librarianness THERE). I sweep into the daycares with confidence and greet a sea of excited faces calling my visit the highlight of the fortnight (assuming any of them would USE the word "fortnight"). The in-house programs end with laughter and joyful thank-yous from parents and children. I'm professional and open and pointedly questioning with book vendors, I find the best options for our library and our budget, I've GOT collection development DOWN.

Gracious, folks. Could it be I'm finally living MY VOCATION IN LIFE?

But what does that mean, says the quiet, worried confused voice inside my head, for the vocation you THOUGHT you had, from way back in your childhood? Maybe your story-loving has found its place in your life, and you don't need to be a writer after all? But it's kind of a silly worry, when "librarian" has to be one of if not THE most common day jobs of authors everywhere, and has been pulled off spectacularly by everyone from Beverly Cleary to Megan McDonald.*

And SECONDLY, as I mused in my latest Lycoris letter, on the topic of "Why do we write?" -- it's only my FICTION that I haven't been writing. And even then I still chip away at this bit of Firefly fanfiction** I've been working on for years, and there's a draft of an early chapter book I managed to come out with a few months back, and the other day I at least started PONDERING how to turn an interesting dream I'd had into a SF story with Deep Social Commentary, which isn't the same as WRITING but at least puts to lie the voice in my head that says I don't even have anything to write ABOUT. But I was WRITING A LETTER. Right now I'm writing a blog post. I write EVERYTHING in my journal.

AND, to get back to the title of this post, I've started again on my annual Actually Getting Paid to Write project, the activities for Pennsylvania One Book Every Young Child (which you will hear me refer to simply as "One Book" in everyday speech, but there are many programs called "One Book" so I'll be more specific this once). This is my ninth year working on it, but I think it's finally sunk in that, YES, I am writing professionally, and I'm quite capable of it.

So the tl;dr of this is: I'm writing this post to let you know that if I seem to fall off the face of the Internet for the next few months-- not posting here much, trying to avoid Twitter (which is hard!), missing your own fascinating blog posts until weeks later if I see them at all-- it is only because I am SUPER BUSY being Moderately Successful In My Professional Life for once. And the usual hanging-in-there busyness of my home life, still. So, come visit me at the library! Or at least feel free to occasionally comment on old posts here, send me hellos or things-that-remind-you-of-me on Facebook or Twitter, or email me if you do that. Or REAL PAPER LETTERS! I'm all about them. (You can even TELEPHONE! Just don't expect me to ever call YOU). Just don't forget me, and know that my apparent absence is in no way related to me being tired of YOU.

---

*If you haven't heard me mention it before, Megan McDonald was the children's librarian at my big public library growing up. But I TOTALLY DIDN'T KNOW IT until after she stopped working there. Or I just never saw her because she never worked Saturdays, which is the only time I was there. Or something. Anyway, the young budding author that I was never got to take advantage of the THEORETICAL MENTOR RIGHT THERE because she wasn't.

**Speaking of which, guys, I just saw this news last night, a week late, and... do you know how STUPIDLY RELIEVED I am to hear about Zoe? Obviously it's just something to make the fans feel better, I mean WHAT A COINCIDENCE, but I don't CARE, it EASES MY SUFFERING to know that at least one little "at least" is canon! ALLOW ME TO FEEL FEELS ABOUT FICTIONAL CHARACTERS, thanks.

Date: 2013-09-28 04:18 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] angelique (from livejournal.com)
So much YES! to this. I had a job that had a great serious title and business cards and sometimes I did professional things, but mostly I felt like a secretary/assistant with a pretty highfalutin' title and just was not spending so much energy doing things I loved and cared about.

And then the hours at that job whittled away. I said I was on furlough because that sounded like something that serious, adult jobs did, but the reality is that my paychecks just kept getting smaller and I suddenly didn't even have the secretarial job to make myself feel good.

I applied for more work and started pitching my web design and coding services every which way and now am very near to doing the latter freelance and full time. It's not what I went to school for, but it's something I'm good at and love and am so very thrilled to say when I introduce myself to new folks :)

It is super thrilling that you have made a niche for yourself at this library and get to flex and use and enjoy your librarian muscles. I love coming across your happy updates on the Twitter, so even if you don't have time to read everything (Who does?!), I hope you'll still drop a line there occasionally while you go on doing AWESOME things.

Date: 2013-09-28 10:24 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] rockinlibrarian.livejournal.com
Aww, it made me smile so wide to know my Twitter updates are appreciated! Yeah, I'll poke in and out-- like just now I have a headache so I was just lying around and didn't feel like doing much more than poking around Twitter on my Nook, so there were a few retweets/replies managed in that time!

Date: 2013-09-29 02:47 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] catarina niza (from livejournal.com)
This post makes me so happy.

GO AMY!

Date: 2013-09-30 05:50 am (UTC)From: [identity profile] kim aippersbach (from livejournal.com)
I want your job. No, seriously: I've been considering what to do now that my kids are mostly grown and I'm approaching an empty nest, and going back to school to become a librarian is on my shortlist (so is becoming a wildly successful writer, but I haven't yet figured out how to spend all day writing, so I would still need a day job). Reading this post has moved the idea up to the top of the shortlist. (I know, I know, I'd have to do my time as some equivalent of very-part-time reference librarian/circulation clerk, but just the possibility of doing what you do every day would make it worth it.)

Isn't it wonderful to feel competent and useful?

You are definitely a writer. Even if you stop blogging so much, which will be sad but quite understandable.

(I'd love to come visit you in your library! What corner of the continent would I have to travel to in order to find you?)

Date: 2013-09-30 05:25 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] rockinlibrarian.livejournal.com
Yes it is!

Aw, thank you for your vote of confidence! It means a lot coming from the editor of Five Flavors of Dumb (did I ever squee to you when I noticed that? I meant to).

(I'm in the east...corner. Um, middle of the east? Mid-Atlantic. Pittsburgh. So... thereabouts).

Awesomeness!

Date: 2013-10-07 06:30 am (UTC)From: (Anonymous)
O, it's so cool to hear you describe your vocation, and utterly awesome that you are now IN CHARGE of the children's and YA sections!!! Lucky for the readers. And yes, you ARE and could never NOT be a writer!!!

You know, I actually often think of calling you on the phone because I would like to have more talking-to-you in my life. But you also know ... I'm SO crappy at that. Maybe a phone date...?

~~ Angie (for some reason the site won't let me be other than anonymous, odd)

Re: Awesomeness!

Date: 2013-10-07 02:52 pm (UTC)From: [identity profile] rockinlibrarian.livejournal.com
It is a relief to know exactly HOW NOT ALONE I am with the telephone-phobia thing. They seem to come out of the woodwork whenever I mention it! But of course telephobes would be drawn to online social media because they're NOT ON THE PHONE that way. Well, maybe if it's a smartphone but I don't think that counts. Soooo... I appreciate the wanting-to-talk-more any rate! And thank you for the first paragraph!

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