![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Every so often I break down and have to make the same post, over and over. So many times here I've spoken out against Us vs. Them and the refusal to listen reasonably to the other side, but what good does it do? It seems to be human nature, and it just gets worse and worse when there's an election afoot. In the past 24 hours I've heard two impassioned pleas coming from two sides of the political fence that used such similar language that it struck me hard in the heart, and not quite in the way either side wanted it to.
First there was one saying something like, "Sure, I know lots of people who say they'll vote conservative for economic reasons, and they say they don't agree with the conservative position on gay marriage, but HOW CAN THEY HONESTLY SAY TO MY FACE THAT THEY'D VOTE FOR SOMEONE WHO WON'T ALLOW ME BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS?!" Then came "Some people think they'll know who to vote for, but ask yourself, if you vote for someone who's pro-abortion, CAN YOU LIVE WITH YOUR DECISION TO LET THOUSANDS OF LIVES BE TAKEN DAILY?" As this last was coming from a religious standpoint, it was followed up with a "Pray on it. Pray on your decision as you go to vote. See what God says to you." And I heard what God said to me. He told me to SPEAK UP. To point out how most people have good intentions, GREAT intentions, but won't listen to the other side or try to work with them.
And I cried, because it seems so hopeless. What can I do? I written that so many times before. And all I've got is this blog, this generally unread, unnoticed blog-- I can speak up, but does anyone even HEAR me, let alone listen? Am I too much in my comfort zone, here? Should I go door to door campaigning for the importance of Respecting and Listening to Each Other?
This IS the first time I've addressed this subject since I discovered that whole Type 9 thing. And I realize how completely and classically Type 9 this IS. Maybe I AM the only one seeing these things (well... me and other Type 9s?). Maybe this is my unique gift, to see all sides and try to get them to come together. As such, maybe I AM a bit of a prophet, and I'm NEEDED to call people together, to break down the barriers, to encourage respectful discussion between differing viewpoints. But I'm frightened and hopeless, because I know people will only hear what they want to. If I am a prophet, I'm a Cassandra, trying and trying to tell people the truth in vain.
But I guess I have to say it anyway.
LISTEN. Listen not to the extreme members of the other side, but to the honest, genuine believers. Hear what they have to say, and take hold of the parts where you agree. Now if you still disagree with their stance on the whole, explain your stance in a way that takes their concerns into consideration. Maybe they'll refuse to listen. Maybe they won't. Maybe they'll tell you something about the issue that YOU never thought of before. Maybe YOU'LL learn. Maybe you'll both continue with your old opinions, or maybe you'll find a way to meet in the middle. WHO KNOWS.
Over and over, people who say they're against stereotyping end up stereotyping others. People who say that freedom is the most important thing try to limit the freedoms of others. People who are against rigid fundamentalism fight against it with their own brand of rigid fundamentalism. And it GETS US NOWHERE. Nowhere but farther away from each other, hurting and hating and tearing down each other when we NEED each other to work together, to build UP.
Yes, it's election time. And I can't tell you who to vote for. Probably you've already decided. But that doesn't matter. What does matter is that you're not hating on the people who will vote differently. That you don't assume the worst about them (whether that they're stupid OR that they're evil). And once the elections have been made, you work WITH whoever's in those positions to find a way that works best for everyone-- not sticking stubbornly and refusing to listen. Share your beliefs-- speak up for what you feel is right-- but keep listening, and discussing, and respecting.
First there was one saying something like, "Sure, I know lots of people who say they'll vote conservative for economic reasons, and they say they don't agree with the conservative position on gay marriage, but HOW CAN THEY HONESTLY SAY TO MY FACE THAT THEY'D VOTE FOR SOMEONE WHO WON'T ALLOW ME BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS?!" Then came "Some people think they'll know who to vote for, but ask yourself, if you vote for someone who's pro-abortion, CAN YOU LIVE WITH YOUR DECISION TO LET THOUSANDS OF LIVES BE TAKEN DAILY?" As this last was coming from a religious standpoint, it was followed up with a "Pray on it. Pray on your decision as you go to vote. See what God says to you." And I heard what God said to me. He told me to SPEAK UP. To point out how most people have good intentions, GREAT intentions, but won't listen to the other side or try to work with them.
And I cried, because it seems so hopeless. What can I do? I written that so many times before. And all I've got is this blog, this generally unread, unnoticed blog-- I can speak up, but does anyone even HEAR me, let alone listen? Am I too much in my comfort zone, here? Should I go door to door campaigning for the importance of Respecting and Listening to Each Other?
This IS the first time I've addressed this subject since I discovered that whole Type 9 thing. And I realize how completely and classically Type 9 this IS. Maybe I AM the only one seeing these things (well... me and other Type 9s?). Maybe this is my unique gift, to see all sides and try to get them to come together. As such, maybe I AM a bit of a prophet, and I'm NEEDED to call people together, to break down the barriers, to encourage respectful discussion between differing viewpoints. But I'm frightened and hopeless, because I know people will only hear what they want to. If I am a prophet, I'm a Cassandra, trying and trying to tell people the truth in vain.
But I guess I have to say it anyway.
LISTEN. Listen not to the extreme members of the other side, but to the honest, genuine believers. Hear what they have to say, and take hold of the parts where you agree. Now if you still disagree with their stance on the whole, explain your stance in a way that takes their concerns into consideration. Maybe they'll refuse to listen. Maybe they won't. Maybe they'll tell you something about the issue that YOU never thought of before. Maybe YOU'LL learn. Maybe you'll both continue with your old opinions, or maybe you'll find a way to meet in the middle. WHO KNOWS.
Over and over, people who say they're against stereotyping end up stereotyping others. People who say that freedom is the most important thing try to limit the freedoms of others. People who are against rigid fundamentalism fight against it with their own brand of rigid fundamentalism. And it GETS US NOWHERE. Nowhere but farther away from each other, hurting and hating and tearing down each other when we NEED each other to work together, to build UP.
Yes, it's election time. And I can't tell you who to vote for. Probably you've already decided. But that doesn't matter. What does matter is that you're not hating on the people who will vote differently. That you don't assume the worst about them (whether that they're stupid OR that they're evil). And once the elections have been made, you work WITH whoever's in those positions to find a way that works best for everyone-- not sticking stubbornly and refusing to listen. Share your beliefs-- speak up for what you feel is right-- but keep listening, and discussing, and respecting.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Not sure...
Date: 2012-10-28 06:45 pm (UTC)From: (Anonymous)okay, not EVERYONE is a crazy conservative. But one person I know (who is completely reasonable about everything else) says it's a known fact that Obama is a muslim and that black people are never monogamous. A KNOWN FACT. This is what they hear on Fox News and believe. This is what so many of them are brainwashed to think. How can you have a reasonable discussion with people who can't reason?
I try never to speak out against people in public, because obviously you just don't know who you'll offend. But I have become jaded by the right-wingers. I have heard their arguments against abortion and seen how we've killed many times more Iraqui civilians and children (CHILDREN) than individuals were killed in 9-11. I'm not saying I agree with Democrats on everything either; I think they can be just as war-hungry. But...the hYPOCRISY. It's hard to take.
That being said, I respect what you're saying and technically I agree with you. I just have trouble putting it into practice, you know? I try to have my own opinion and kind of stay away from everything else so that I don't get upset.
Re: Not sure...
Date: 2012-10-28 07:16 pm (UTC)From:I didn't get into religion very much but it was in the back of my mind. Religion is full of sides where this is FREQUENTLY an issue. I'm a practicing Roman Catholic. There are people who look at me and are like "How can you still BELIEVE that? They're against gay marriage! That whole sex-abuse scandal stuff was handled so HORRIBLY! They don't allow female priests! It took them hundreds of years to pardon Galileo! ET CETERA!" Sometimes I joke and say I'm actually a Bad Catholic instead of a Catholic, but it's more than that. I DON'T AGREE with everything the Church Leaders have said or done. But I also get a lot of GOOD things from my practice, so I stick with it. I believe most people are this way about most of the things they believe or follow. But people on the outside just assume that everyone on the inside is painted with the same brush. It's not true. That's part of what I was trying to say.
By the way, don't be afraid to sign your name. I'm accepting of all people willing to discuss!
no subject
Date: 2012-10-31 06:24 pm (UTC)From:I keep trying to hear the other side of issues and keep being told that I'm an evil faggy baby killer who is trying to destroy America. Earlier this election cycle I accidentally got into a slew of facebook fights over what I thought were innocuous comments (basically I said that I didn't want to see any gay bashing [this was tied into the whole chick-fil-a thing] and if you felt like that about me and mine then we might as well not be friends) and suddenly people who I've known and loved for years were telling me that I was censoring and freedom of speech and I clearly hate America and don't I know my bible because I'm sending the whole world to hell. When I see that over and over again out of people I thought were even-minded reasonable people who just had different priorities than I do?
It's hard to continue believing that the other side has anyone's best interests at heart but their own. I've stopped believing that there are decent Republican politicians out there. There are decent Republicans but I don't know of any that are elected.
no subject
Date: 2012-10-31 07:23 pm (UTC)From:Did you see this post of mine during the Chick-fil-a thing? (http://rockinlibrarian.livejournal.com/268055.html) I was lucky-- the only backlash I got from my family was from an uncle (technically in-law at that-- married to my dad's sister so not a blood relative, if you want to be clear!) whom I already knew to be a Crotchety Old Man-type conservative, anyway (I have this sad dread that my husband is going to turn into him when he gets old, actually. OH LORD). My aunt who had sent the email forward in the first place actually called me in tears after he sent his irate response, saying she was not at ALL offended by my email response and appreciated my thoughtful and calm reasoning, and she SO SO didn't want anyone to be fighting and mad and hurt over it. I doubt she changed her opinion on the issue, but she is more careful of the us vs them slamming.
Personally, I'm not sure there are any decent politicians, period. I think there should be a new sort of system, where we elect leaders based on their leadership abilities instead of their stances on issues, and then we have more opinion-poll sort of elections on the issues themselves, separately. That way we don't have to be so all-or-nothing.