As with most self-improvement things in my life, I have to trick myself into doing them. So I sign up for things or agree to do things without thinking about it too much so I don't have time to second-guess myself. And then I have to show up and do the thing, and there's that moment of "aauuugh, they think I'm competent to do this how could I have deceived them so badly" and then I look surreptitiously around (look how competent I am: I can spell surreptitiously on the first try!) and notice the other people on the committee, or whatever, are quietly bumbling along doing their thing, so I just start bumbling along, and usually it turns out I can manage fairly well. Maybe not as well as that other person who would have done it so much better, but they weren't available and I was, so, you know, props to me for showing up.
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chiming
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Date: 2014-04-18 03:36 pm (UTC)From:As with most self-improvement things in my life, I have to trick myself into doing them. So I sign up for things or agree to do things without thinking about it too much so I don't have time to second-guess myself. And then I have to show up and do the thing, and there's that moment of "aauuugh, they think I'm competent to do this how could I have deceived them so badly" and then I look surreptitiously around (look how competent I am: I can spell surreptitiously on the first try!) and notice the other people on the committee, or whatever, are quietly bumbling along doing their thing, so I just start bumbling along, and usually it turns out I can manage fairly well. Maybe not as well as that other person who would have done it so much better, but they weren't available and I was, so, you know, props to me for showing up.