That last paragraph. It's absolutely true most of our psychic energy goes towards processes of resistance in one form or another - hypervigilance, holding ourselves together, holding the jungian shadow at bay, etc., and not processes of expansion, if you know what I mean. I've no doubt you're untapped genius potential. I've also no doubt it's hard as hell to tap it (that sounds wrong).
Anyway, I hope at least you're satisfied with the course of therapy you're taking. It took me a while to get it (I think) right.

Cat

PS: loving the captchas here.